When You Have an Eloper

Last week I talked about eloping, as it relates to autism. If you have a child who elopes, I don’t need to tell you how absolutely terrifying that is. One moment your child is at your side, and the next they have vanished completely. They are quick, and they are often silent.

When my son was little, I began to believe that it was inevitable that he would go missing one day, so I did everything I could think of to prepare for that eventuality.

While there is truly nothing I can suggest to another parent that will take their worry away, (just as nothing could take mine away), I do want to share a list of the things I did during that time. Perhaps there is something on this list that will give you just a little more peace of mind.

1. ID Bracelet/Tracking Bracelet
   When my son was small, we got him a little ID bracelet to wear whenever we went out. We engraved the medical symbol and the word “Autism” on it, plus our names and phone numbers.
   
   If your child takes a prescription, or has more medical complications, such as seizures, getting an officially-registered Medical Alert bracelet is a good idea. When medical personnel look up the bracelet’s ID, they will be able to see medications, current doses, the names of any treating physicians, and more.
   
   In some areas, a digitally-traceable bracelet program may be available, such as Angelsense. Some larger cities have implemented programs that issue trackable bracelets through local law enforcement departments.
   
   In areas where these official bracelets are not available, I have heard of parents creating their own tracking bracelets by making use of fitness trackers or air tags.
   
   
2. Story
   I wrote a short script and printed it out as a little booklet. It went something like this: Hello, name is ____. I am lost. Can you help me? With our names and phone numbers. In addition to reading this booklet to him often, in the hopes he could remember, I also put a copy into the little Lightning McQueen backpack he liked to wear, in the hopes that a kind stranger would find it.
   
   
3. Movie
   When my son began talking, he used echolalia to communicate. When I noticed that he could memorize and recite large portions of dialogue from movies, I made him a movie! His Dad recorded me reading the booklet I had made. I added pictures of him, me, and his Dad, and read the script twice, nice and slow. We would play that video for him every time he had TV time, just like a commercial break.
   
   
4. Runaway Kit
   It feels a little morbid to plan for your child to go missing, but that is something you have to think about when you have an eloper. One thing my husband and I put together at that time was a kit to help the police find him.
   It contained:
   A recent photo
   A good physical description including height, weight, and birthmarks
   Our son’s fingerprints
   A couple strands of his hair with roots attached, for DNA
   
   

This is a hard subject, but it’s my hope that this post will reach the people who need it most. I see you, Moms, Dads, & Caregivers. I know how much you worry.

Below, I have made a fill-in-the-blank version of the book I made for my son all those years ago. Click to download it for free. You may print it at home or your local copy center, and fill in the blanks with your own contact information.

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