Summer Recap (2023)

I’m back from my annual family-time blogging break.
Here’s a little life update of what we’ve been up to.

What We’re Doing: Family Vacation

We took a family road trip to Drumheller AB and the Royal Tyrell Museum. It was the perfect destination for a family with a 6-year-old and a 9-year-old. There was something there for everyone (and plenty more left to do next time!) We enjoyed the museum, fossil digging, a fossil-casting class, a visit to the World’s Largest Dinosaur, a trip to Barney’s Adventure Park, a sight-seeing tandem bicycle tour, and a sightseeing loop around the city to take in the amazing views of canyons, coulees, and hoodoos. We all loved it!

Our nine-year-old on the autism spectrum had some doubts leading up to the trip. His anxiety crept in, and made him obsessed about the dinosaurs we were about to see. He was afraid that the dinosaurs would be real and dangerous. I spent a very long night talking out his worries.

I assured him over and over that dinosaurs are extinct, and that there would be no live dinosaurs. Still, he worried.

I googled photos of every place on our itinerary, “See? No real dinosaurs, just fossils and statues.” Still, he worried.

Then, I appealed to his emotional side. “Do you think Mommy would take you somewhere where you could get hurt? Mommy loves you so much! I would never take you anywhere dangerous.” Still, he worried.

I was at a loss. I didn’t know how else to reassure him. So finally, I tried something that I do with my own anxiety: fight unreasonable fear with unreasonable ridiculousness.

“Ok son, I’ll make you a deal: if any dinosaurs mess with you on our trip, I’ll punch them in the face!”

“What will happen if a dinosaur pushes me?”

“I’ll punch him in the face.”

“What if he bites me?”

“I’ll punch him in the face.”

“What if he tries to carry me away?”

“I’ll punch him in the face.”

He began to giggle, then belly-laugh, then I began to laugh. He ran me through at least 30 more scenarios, and assured him that each and every time I would come to his defense.

It worked.

He found enough courage to get in the car and give this dinosaur vacation a try. Once we arrived, everything was fine. Turns out the dinosaurs were all statues and fossils after all.

That didn’t stop me from punching a few dinosaur statues in the face, though. You know, just in case.

What We’re Reading

I’ve started a new family tradition. For our summer holiday, I purchase the first couple books of a new book series for the kids and we read them out loud together, whether that’s around a campfire, tucked into a cozy hotel, or to pass the time driving. Great stories make great memories!

Last year’s series was The Princess in Black. This year, we gave The Underdogs a try.

The Underdogs Series
By Tracey West, Illustrated by Kyla May
Children’s Chapter Book (Approx. Grade 2+)

Nova, Duke, Harley, and Peanut aren’t the most agile pups at Barksdale Academy, but they are determined to pass their K-9 exams! With a little creativity, they figure out how to adapt the challenges on the exam course to their own special abilities. They won’t be best in show, but they’ll learn how to put their best paw forward.

My kids enjoyed these stories for their combination of physical humor and puns. I enjoyed the themes of doing your best, and learning not to let bullies get you down. I also really appreciated the part where Team Underdog modifies the course by giving the most distracted pup a way to stay on track, the most sensory-sensitive pup a suit to keep the mud off, and the pup most afraid of heights a pass to skip one of the obstacles. Sounds like a story about inclusion to me! (I just wish that the judges in the book recognized their clever adaptations instead of docking points for them… but then again, that certainly is realistic! *sighs in special needs parent*)

I’d give this series an average rating. We found the books interesting enough, but they just weren’t as exciting as other books we have tried. They are missing the “just can’t put it down” factor. However, I will give credit where credit is due: the stories are perfectly grade-appropriate. I appreciate when the reading level and the content level of children’s books match, since some books tend to be too scary for the recommended age, or are too simple/too hard of a reading level for the kids who would enjoy their theme/content. My kid who is reading at a Grade 2 level found them interesting and mostly comfortable to read, with some challenging words to get excited about conquering.

Every page has black and white illustrations and a large font size for easy reading. There are currently three books in this series. They are simple and gentle reads for your little dog-lover.

What I’m Watching

Shiny Happy People
Amazon Prime
Documentary Mini-Series

I had no intention of watching Shiny Happy People when I first saw its cover pop up on my feeds. I didn’t watch 19 Kids and Counting, and have never followed the Duggar family. Reality TV, especially when there are children involved, is really not my thing.

But then I saw a preview, and then I heard cult survivors talking about it, and then I learned that this show wasn’t so much about the Duggars as it was about the cult that the famous Duggar family belongs to: The IBLP, or The Institute in Basic Life Principles. Cults masquerading as christianity or churches, touting “family values,” is something that does interest me. Because I know just how dangerous they can be. Because I’ve lived a similar, albeit less severe, experience as a child growing up in high-control religion.

Well, partway through episode 2, I had to pause. My hands were shaking as I reached out to tap my phone screen. I wasn’t prepared for how close to home this show would hit. It was triggering, but it was also extremely validating.

This docuseries is not for everyone. It comes with content warnings of spousal abuse, child abuse, and sexual assault. Watch at your own risk. However, if you are a Christian leader, or if you are a Christian who has ever had trouble imagining why anyone would “walk away from the faith,” or “deconstruct their faith,” or “abandon the church” after growing up immersed in the church, these four episodes will give you a small taste of why. Some of us didn’t experience “church hurt,” we experienced abuse. Don’t judge until you’ve walked in our shoes.

What We’re Doing: Summer Camp

The boys did day camp again this summer, and for the first time ever, they were in the same age bracket and had to attend the same week. I wasn’t sure how this would go over.

My kids have always done day camp solo. A big reason why is because I try to be very intentional about letting our youngest be a kid. With an autistic Big Bother, his life will always look a little different than his friends’ lives, but I don’t want him to feel that he needs to take care of his brother or has to grow up before his time. He is so caring, kind, and helpful because he has a good heart, but I don’t want to forget that that good heart belongs to a little boy who is only six. He needs to be cared for too.

All that to say, when registration time came around, I decided to have a private chat with Little Brother to learn his feelings on the camp situation. I let him know that he would be going the same week as Big Brother, and offered to put in a separate cabin request so they could each have their own space.

I had to wait approximately one second before he made his feelings clear:

“I get to go with him?! Whoo-hoo!”

“Are you sure? It’s ok if you’d rather request a friend.”

“I get to go with my brother! This is gonna be so great!”

It wasn’t have to, it was get to. He gets to spend time with his brother. He gets the chance to introduce him to his friends. He gets to share this experience with his autistic brother.

Special-needs siblings are truly some of the best people I know. They teach us all about what unconditional love and acceptance looks like. It’s an honor to know and raise such a big-hearted kid.

Blog News

You may have noticed that my bio photo and social media profile pics have changed. I took advantage of the break to get a some headshots done by my talented friend, Deanna. Go give her page some love! Deanna Brown Art & Photography

And that about catches you up. Weekly Friday posts will resume starting now.
Don’t forget, you can also catch up with me on Facebook and Instagram between posts.

© 2023 Ashley Lilley – First time commenting? Please read my Comment Policy.